dessert meals

you know, i was thinking about blogging about food, since i don’t really blog enough about food, given that i like food so much. so i was thinking about coming up with a list of insane desserts. then it struck me that as much as i like all my desserts, i like them when they come with other things… in combination, working with each other. and then i thought, why not a dessert meal!? you know, normally when you have rice, you have rice + meat + veg + soup. dessert should work the same way. why not MAKE IT A MEAL?

without further ado, here are some purely theoretical constructs that come out of the oven of my mind… if anyone does actually make these, PLEASE let me have some.

forgive me if there are no names to these meals…

now, for our first entree, we start with a generous slice of carrot cake. as much as i don’t like carrots, for some reason, i adore carrot cake. that’s quite something, considering that i don’t really like cakeĀ that much. so. back to the carrot cake. it has to be thick and dense, with plenty of nuts inside: walnuts and pecans preferable. some raisins would be good too. most importantly the cream cheese topping has to be serious cream cheese, the melt-in-your-mouth kind. not too strong a cream cheese, but just to go with dat carrot. of course the carrot cake should have some coconut shavings. marzipan to top it off. just a little marzipan. so our main course is carrot cake. it’s pretty heavy so i’d say pick a cinnamon-flavoured coffee to go with it. just nice. hot coffee (you know, i just recently discovered that i might be beginning to appreciate coffee) and cake is a great way to start the day. or end the day. okay this meal is quite heavy, what with coffee and carrot cake, so i’d suggest some super fresh raspberries and strawberries on the side. so that they kind of enhance each other, you know? sweet versus tangy. and you get that with the cake and coffee also. so you can experiment. this is kinda atas though.

next, something i’ve actually done before… much to my mum’s disapproval. but she’s the one who made everything. okay, nearly everything.

this is a composite thing which requires some arrangement so listen carefully folks!

the first thing you put on the plate is a generous slice of superdense dark chocolate, pecan, and cranberry brownie. the NON-CAKE type. we want a brownie that is like chewing solid chocolate… squishy chocolate. that brownie feeling, you feel me? dark dark chocolate. this has to be a decadent brownie. it must be. and with that wonderful brownie crust, tantalizingly sweet and lightly toasted/baked, but bite it open and then you find the luscious filling of the rest of it all, decorated with the aforementioned pecans and cranberries.

then we need a slice of warm apple pie. real appie pie. apple pie with wonderfully buttery pastry (oh nom nom nom) and sliced apples inside. real apples. apple slices, not bits. the apples should be slightly soft but still have a light crunch to them when you bite down. and the pastry shouldn’t be too thick… there’s a golden ratio between filling and pastry so it must be fulfilled. of course a very important element in apple pie is that all the sauce is thick and gooey. you know, when you bake apple pie, all that delicious stuff comes oozing out… the apple sauce thing. oh yums.

finally our third slice will be a delectably light lemon sponge cake. not too light, reasonably dense, but spongy enough to soak up liquid stuff. lemony enough to give that zing to your mouth, a counterbalance to the strength and moxiousity of the brownie and the apple pie.

so what you do now is to arrange these three side by side on a plate. next, you need to scoop an entire load of vanilla ice cream (the good kind, mind you) on top. plonk it on top of the brownie and apple pie, so that it starts to melt. make sure you have a lot of ice cream, so that the center remains solid (and you can eat it). finally top the whole thing off by drizzling 2 tablespoonfuls of baileys cream and lashing the entire concoction with chocolate sauce. not hershey’s chocolate sauce. real, melted down, still-heated chocolate sauce. lashings, mind you. not little droplets.

so the idea is that the chocolate and applesauce and ice cream and baileys will all mix together in this chemical explosion, guaranteed to excite your tastebuds. it will then be absorbed by the lemon cake, which will transform from a humble offering into a gargantuan mixture of flavours, all brought together by that lemoniness we were talking about earlier. the brownie continues to serve as a base for it, and apple pie is simply happiness cooked on a plate. so you have chocolate + fruity sweetness + icecream and all the wonderful things. i think i shall call this the three-in-one-mega-dessert-stew. a stew is what it looked like.

note: mum was quite horrified, cousins quite fascinated.

finally, we shall end off with something smaller… a dessert of desserts, you might call it. i’m sorry i’m getting hungry just thinking about all this.

what we need is fruit crumble. mostly peaches and apples, with a smattering of blueberries and strawberries. did you know that when you make blueberry and strawberry crumble, the resultant is an incredibly vibrant hue of purple sauce that emerges? it is also delicious. so we have these 4 fruits. and we bake them in a large dish. of course it isn’t just fruits, you need a proper topping. which means oats and crumbly thingoes and nuts and more nuts and chocolate chips. not too much chocolate chips. oh, and cranberries. you can never have enough cranberries. they go with everything.

then you bake your fruit crumble till its steaming hot and all the juices are flowing, merging into a river of flavour, fruity goodness that is guaranteed to satisfy your soul and tickle your throat (in a good way). at the same time you need a cup of hot chocolate. the real stuff. the bitter, dark, thick stuff. a cup of it.

now you must believe me when i tell you what to do. you need to take a cup of crumble, and put it into a cup of chocolate. not the other way round. pouring your chocolate on top of your crumble merely makes your crumble chocolatey. what we want is to SOAK the crumble. hence, the crumble must enter the chocolate. think about it this way: when you go shower, the water falls all over you, you get wet. but when you go swimming, you go into the water, then you get Wet. understand?

allow crumble to soak, and allow chocolate to seep into crumble. ever tried chocolate-infused apple? you’re about to.

to top it all off, pour a little bit of baileys on top. and a small (really, a small) scoop of vanilla ice cream. hot + cold is very good. makes it all the better.

dessert is all about contrasting harmonies.

 

 

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